Meet Link, our tiny peach and cream adventurer from The Legend of Zelda, who has absolutely no intention of saving the kingdom until someone scratches behind his ears. He has the face of a woodland prince and a magnificent fluffy tail that we’re fairly certain qualifies as an enchanted weapon.

Unfortunately, his combat experience is limited to attacking string and losing arguments with his own feet. While the original Link battles monsters and rescues princesses, our Link has a slightly different quest: FIND A FOREVER HOME. DEFEAT THE EVIL VACUUM. OBTAIN UNLIMITED SNACKS.

The Master Sword remains unclaimed. Hyrule is in shambles. And our hero is requesting a second dinner.

But here’s the thing about little heroes. Sometimes the greatest adventure isn’t saving a kingdom. It’s finding someone who loves you enough to make you their whole world.

NEW QUEST UNLOCKED: GIVE LINK HIS HAPPILY EVER AFTER.

P.S. Princess Zelda, we’ve located your hero. He’s in Rhode Island, he’s ridiculously sweet, and he’s refusing to leave until someone opens a can of Fancy Feast.