SOMEONE PLEASE EXPLAIN WHY THIS KITTEN IS LOUNGING LIKE A DIVORCED MILLIONAIRE IN PALM BEACH.

Rhode Island, we need to discuss Honey. The blue eyes. The pink nose. The tiny toe beans. And the unmistakable expression of someone waiting for the cabana boy to bring her another cocktail.

Meet Honey, a kitten with creamy white fluff and absolutely unreasonable expectations. Her siblings are Cherry, Maple, and Colby Jack. Three names that sound like an expensive brunch menu, although we’re still trying to understand why someone brought cheese.

Honey has appointed herself the sophisticated member of the family. She’s requested Egyptian cotton sheets, a heated sunroom, and breakfast served promptly at 8. When informed that she’s currently living at an animal rescue, she asked to speak with the concierge. Unfortunately, the concierge is a volunteer named Nancy, and Nancy has approximately 400 other things to do.

Honey is considering a one star review. Behind this ridiculous little Palm Beach socialite is a gorgeous, sweet faced kitten looking for someone to love her, play with her, and give her the wonderful life she deserves. A sunny windowsill would be appreciated. Egyptian cotton is negotiable.